Wednesday, October 11, 2006

These are the people in my gymborhood

In my gymborhood. In my gym-bor-hood. These are the people in my gymborhood. The people that we see each daaaaay. Ahhh, that Mr. Rogers certainly was a lyrical genius. Jason and I are now in our sixth week of the gym routine and we've noticed that there is quite a cast of characters at David Lloyd Fulham.

Strange treadmill-runner lady - This one might be my favorite. She's older (I'm guessing late 40's) and comes to work out in full make up and a sports bra top regardless of the fact that she has a blindingly white and rather jiggly torso. She cranks the treadmill speed and intermittenly will grab the sidebars of the machine and lift herself up just enough so that she's not running on it but rather dragging her tiptoes really fast. The worst bit is that her belly jiggles really bad and sort of lops over her too-tight pants. It is REALLY bizarre looking. And she's forever trying to chat up much younger guys. Everytime the guy on the treadmill next to her would slow down or pause, she would as well and would find something, ANYTHING to strike up a conversation about.

Sideways trucker hat guy - This one's pretty self-explanatory. Not only is it odd to wear a trucker hat cocked sideways and riding high on the noggin to the gym but doesn't he know trucker hats are sooooooo over?

Don't know what to do with my hands when I run girl - We call her Talladega Nights because when she picks up speed on the treadmill, she kind of limply holds her hands out in front of her with her elbows kind of jutted out to the sides like she's airing out her underarms or something instead of the normal running stance of loose fists, arms bent at the elbows, swinging back and forth. Those of you who have seen this movie will understand why we call her Talladega Nights. "I'm not really sure what to do with my hands."

Barely clothed Asian chick - Another fairly self-explanatory one. Granted, she has the body to wear this kind of stuff so I can't fault her there but some of us (Monique, back me up here?) are getting pretty tired of looking at her bumcheeks. She wears little sports bra tops with boy-short bottoms. It wouldn't be sooooo bad if she didn't sit in the lounge/cafe area with her legs spread out and propped up on a table. Ewww. Put that kitty away. Before we know it, it'll be Clam Jam 2006!

Green Gal - This one really perplexes me. This girl wears the SAME EXACT OUTFIT every single day. Not only that, but it's head-to-toe green. Kelly green sweatpants and a kelly green t-shirt. I call her froggy. What's more is that she's a really cute girl - good figure, blonde, pretty face. At first, I hesitated to poke fun because I thought "Well, maybe she can't afford more gym clothes..." but then it occurred to me that if she can afford a peak membership to David Lloyd, she can certainly afford gym clothes. So it's all systems go in the poking fun department.

Gumby Arms Dude - Ok. So this guy runs on the treadmill and will occasionally shake out his arms while continuing to run. So basically, picture a guy running at a pretty good clip and all the sudden his arms go limp hanging in front of him (caveman posture stye) and they start to flail about as if made of rubber.

I hope I've given you some interesting visuals to think about. At the very least, it keeps us entertained every morning...


Monique said...

OMG that made me laugh out loud!
I think I saw green girl the other day!!!
And yes - barely there clothes girl - saw her on Monday in her itsy bitsy outfit AGAIN - just wanna tell her to put some clothes on darn it!

There's a host of characters in the evenings as well - you'll have to ask Murray about barely there swimsuit girl who was standing near the pool entrance - I think he nearly had a heart attack when he saw her!

Muz said...

I know EXACTLY that chick who runs on her tippy toes.

The scantly clad asian chick - know her well - too well. I've come across many chicks like this at Lloyds - "there you are, sitting at the edge of a bench lifting dumbbells with the guns "1002..1003.." then suddenly some peroxide Barbie dressed in 'eastern euro paint' plonks herself down 2 feet from your face with the swiss ball to do sit ups in your direction. So now you're faced with the dilemma of either staring at the ceiling while working out - drawing attention to yourself like you're a Gump cousin - or courageously staring down the kitty - eye to eye - risking a slap and slanderous accusations from onlookers.