Is there some sort of conspiracy out there to make normal-looking girls like myself feel ten kinds of fat when we try on beachwear? If not, then can you explain to me why, when I selected the very same size swimsuit bottom that I always wear in regular clothes and knickers, I felt like I needed to somehow deflate my ass and hips just to squeeze them halfway on?
Let me tell you, and I speak from experience here, there is nothing that will make you feel worse about yourself than seeing your pasty white rear-end squishing out of a too-small bikini bottom.
I think, for most women, this would be exactly the kick they needed to not even look at a carb for the next week. I'm not most women.
I marched myself straight to the next showing of Mama Mia and ordered up a nice big tub of popcorn and a bucket of Diet Coke. I may have popcorned myself into yet another size up.